This film is for all you people who live in small towns, remote from “civilization.”
If you ever wondered what city slickers REALLY think about you, this is your chance to see first hand.
Kind people who give you a lift wherever you want to go (faster than any taxi, and for free) aren’t “kind people.” They are weird monsters with an ulterior motive, always — usually, if you’re an attractive lady, they want to get into your pants.
In the big city, homeless people are drunks and addicts who lived under bridges in filth and garbage. That’s exactly where they belong.
Homeless in the country live in neat little caves and keep a wary eye for the locals, your friendly “Neighborhood Crime Watch.” They earn their keep, many times over.
Country cops are lazy, uncouth, and sexual maniacs. If you’re a pretty lady, don’t EVEN ask for help from a country cop. You’ll regret it, for damn sure.
There are no such things as family values, childhood friends, or avuncular neighbors — much less doddering old grannies. In the country families are deranged, friends are dangerous, and neighbors are vile, vicious, and feral.
Never mind the sweeping landscape, the ocean waves crashing on rocky shores, the morning mist, the nighttime chills, and the driving rains.
It’s only mother nature, just as mentally disturbed as the Neanderthals living hereabouts — maybe even more so.
